Away in a manger

Today I started reading The Poisonwood Bible. It's pretty good so far. It takes place in the Congo in the early 1960s. It's interesting though because it brings up a lot of issues of colonialism and Western cultural arrogance. There's a lot we (and by "we" I include the whole world) don't understand about the countless cultures that exist in this world...and a lot we don't even try to understand. Yet for hundreds, probably even thousands, of years, we (here I mostly mean Western cultures but goodness knows probably every other culture has done it too—but the victor writes history, right?) have gone barging into various countries and regions to "civilize" the "lesser" cultures.

Just because something is different and just because it seems to me or to you to be less efficient or effective or moral or whatever, doesn't mean it is. Or maybe it is, but I guarantee there's a reason behind the method. Or maybe there isn't. But different does not inherently require us to categorize into "good" and "bad" or "better" and "worse". Not everything is that black and white—in fact, I'd venture to say that nothing is that black and white. Everything has its value. Just like everyone has his or her value. We have to learn to not be so quick to judge—I have to not be so quick to judge (even now)--which is something that I think we're taught to do from a young age—for better and for worse. We're taught that the quicker your wit and the quicker your tongue, the quicker you'll get ahead. But there's a lot to be seen from the back, too. So maybe being in front isn't where we need to be all the time. Or it's not where everyone needs to be. And if you're not "in front" it doesn't mean you have to try to get to the front. My point is that we just need to learn to accept and value people and accept and value the way they live their lives.

Of course, this doesn’t mean that we shouldn't challenge each other or challenge the actions and attitudes of others--or ourselves. But it does mean that we should seek to understand before we do that. It's a much slower process, but if you or I want to do any good—for others or ourselves—we have to take that time. Haraka haraka haina baraka. Hurry hurry brings no blessings. It's a Kenyan proverb we ought to take to heart. A proverb I ought to take to heart.

Oh I went on a tangent and forgot the rest of the day! So anyway, today I made a manger and carried a bail of hay on my back…you know, the regular daily routine ; )

Ok it might have technically been straw… The manger was for Baby Jesus aka Baby Johnny—age 2(ish), with his mother Mary aka MaryAnn—age 9, the Little Drummer Girl aka Florence—age 3, and five angels—ages 5-8—dressed in white First Communion dresses, halos, and hand-crafted wings. The scene was the first Christmas, staged for photos for this year's Christmas cards from Hekima Place. In the first setup, we had a laundry basket with a beautiful Kenyan kanga (cloth you might use as a wrap-around skirt, to cover something, or anything else, really) covering the basket, with straw—freshly dried by one of the uncles this week for this express purpose!—and Baby Jesus laid carefully inside. The Little Drummer Girl kneeled nearby, drumming on a little drum one of the volunteers purchased as a souvenir. In the other scene, we had Baby Jesus held by Mary, sitting on a bed of straw, with one little angel right behind her holding a large gold star and four more angels further back holding the letters N-O-E-L. We took the pictures with the videocamera and we'll get some stills from the video footage so that we can get ones where they're all smiling, which of course was a challenge. : )

We also interviewed Kristie today. Kristie was one of the five volunteers who came as a group at the same time as Lindsey and me and who is leaving on Sunday. Kristie came here last summer, too, so she has had a longer relationship with Hekima Place and the girls here. I filmed; Lindsey interviewed. It was short but sweet and should be perfect for the promo piece we're doing for Hekima. We're going to have a short clip about volunteering at Hekima Place so that when Mum Kate is talking to people she can encourage them to come volunteer here!

A big part of what Mum Kate and Hekima Place want to achieve is a better understanding in the US and other parts of the world of Kenyan culture, of the terrible consequences of AIDS, of women's and girls' issues in this part of the world, and of what we--as Americans or Canadians or people of whatever nationality, and simply as fellow human beings--can and must do for our brothers and sisters around the world. Part of how she does this is by encouraging people--whether you're a student, a lawyer, a soccer coach, or a retired man or woman--to come here and work with these kids and work at the school where they go. It's great for the kids because they get more individualized attention--in school and in play--than the mums and uncles can afford to give them in their busy days.

But also, as I'm learning now, these girls have so much more to give to the volunteers than we could possibly give to them. They are so willing to open their hearts to us, even though they've had countless volunteers here before who've come and gone. They have a strength and a loving trust in them that I strive for and I think a lot of us yearn for. They're truly remarkable young women and I can't wait to see what wonderful and incredible things they do with their lives.
Some people come into our lives and quickly go.
Others stay for awhile and leave footprints on our hearts
And we are never ever the same.

They've also started a program here that connects the girls with a Big Sister who writes letters to them and sends them cards and presents on their birthdays and holidays. This helps create a stronger bond for those individuals who are Big Sisters (and there are a few Big Brothers, too) to the circumstances and the lives of these girls. It also helps create a cultural bridge for the girls, here, as well, who as a result get a glimpse into an outside adult's perspective, culture, and life. So we want to help Mum Kate continue this tradition of cultural and social outreach through the film.

After the interview, we walked to town to get food for dinner (because Saturday nights are chicken and rice) and to get the Christmas pictures put on a CD. It's such a nice walk into town, so we try to do it as often as we can now! It takes about an hour, but it really doesn't seem that long. Lindsey and I usually get into some sort of philosophical or strangely hypothetical (sometimes really goofy) conversation so the time passes quickly. : )

We walk along the side of the road which is a dirt footpath that in some parts seems deliberate but in other parts has clearly just been worn down by frequent pedestrians. Early in the walk, if you look down the hill on either side of the road you can see a stream. Gladys has told us that there are often baptisms in the stream. One Sunday on the way back from church we actually saw a baptismal processional headed towards the stream. Fortunately, even though it's nearly winter here, it was a pretty warm day in the high 70s or low 80s by that time.

Later on the walk we pass the Giant Eagle Church, which looks more like a giant picnic with its huge white tents and black-, red-, and green-colored billboard advertising the times of its services and the full names of its pastors. On Sundays this place is packed with cars, all day long pulling in and out when the back-to-back services begin and end.

Further along the walk there is a bus stop with a little bus stop shelter similar to what you might see in the US but with dirt underfoot instead of a cement sidewalk. Also, while you might be less likely to see a professional businessperson in a suit on a bus in the States, here a suited man--or woman--is a regular on the matatus. This bus stop is a regular stop for the matatus and buses along this route (the 111 route that goes up and down Ngong Road from Karen Town Centre all the way into Nairobi, so I'm told, though I've yet to the end in that direction).

There's a kiosk not too far beyond that whose outside walls are bright green with the logos advertising Safaricom internet and phone services. The woman inside sells Coca-Colas and bananas and meat seasonings and various other supplies you might need to pick up on your way home.

When we got to town we bought fresh broccoli and eggplant and mushrooms because, while I do love the food here and haven't gotten sick of any of it yet, Lindsey and I have both just been craving more vegetables. We eat a lot of greens--skuma--in the meals the mums prepare, and the girls help us prepare mchicha and some other green whose name I can't recall and that I would doubtfully be able to spell--both wild greens from the shamba--when there's meat for dinner, and Lindsey and I eat a lot of tomatoes and avocadoes (fresh guacamole too!) on our own, but it's still not enough! They just eat so many starchy foods here. We have githeri for lunch on the weekends and occasionally for dinner--githeri is basically potatoes and beans (like pinto or red beans) and maize (big and chewy corn that is oh so good) with some onions and fresh cilantro (or maybe some other fresh herb). It's good, but starchy. Other meals include:
- Pasta (which they only call "spaghetti" and won't know what you're talking about if you call it pasta or noodles) and minced meat (which of course I don't eat) and sometimes cabbage (delicious! but oily) too
- Rice and chicken (every Saturday night...so LJM and I either bring some veggies over with me or just eat in Amani separately)
- Rice and lentils or green grams (which are basically just lentils...there may be some difference but I can't tell)
- Rice and a bean/some cabbage mixture
- Spaghetti and bean mixture
- Rice and Skuma (greens)
- Ugali (thick pasty/doughy mixture made from maize (did I mention they call corn maize?)--I think...now I can't remember...I'll double check on that) and skuma
- Chapatti (fried flat bread) with bean mixture and/or skuma
-Rice and boiled fish w/tomatoes (again, of course, I don't eat the fish...oh and P.S. it still has some bones in it a lot of times) and skuma

So the good news is that we get a lot of protein here...they get meat/fish about 4 times a week. That actually, apparently, is upsetting for some of the girls because Mum Kate says a lot of them suffer from a sort of survivor's guilt. Most of these girls have brothers, sisters, cousins, grandparents (some even have parents), and other relatives outside of Hekima Place who not only don't get meat 4x a week but rarely have more than one meal a day. And before they came here, a lot of these girls only had one or two meals a day, which probably had meager nutritional value. So it's understandable that when dinner is being served and there's a big chicken leg in or a big helping of minced meat in front of you, it's not just food--it's a pressing reminder that your family, your loved ones, are probably not as fortunate right now. They might be eating, but it's not too likely that they're getting the meat and protein their bodies need. And plus, they like meat. Meat is tasty. It's a treat, in a lot of ways, in addition to being nutritional. And it's a privilege and a provision they didn't have nearly as much when they were at home. Some girls, when they go home on school breaks, end up losing quite a bit of weight. One girl actually lost 5kg, which is about 11 pounds, in one week at home. I don't even know how that's even possible. Needless to say, when she got back to Hekima Place they looked into her home situation--I'm not sure if she still goes back or not but I know she would only be allowed to go back if the mums here were certain that she would not have anything like that happen again.

Anyway, after dinner, we had quite the celebration for the volunteers who were leaving. This farewell party was a bit different than the previous ones we've had. We were in Maisha this time, and girls in each of the grades got up together and sang a song or two of their choice for the volunteers. Then the mums did one and even us volunteers (including the ones who are leaving) did one—we sang "Lean On Me". It was more like a talent show than anything else! As far as I could tell, all of the songs the girls sang were of some religious context (of course, some were in Swahili, but I think I heard "Bwana", which means "Father", a lot in those songs so it's fair to guess those we're Christian songs as well).

[Sidenote: They're pretty openly religious—mostly Christian—here, similar to the Southeastern US, though I wouldn't say they're quite as openly religious as the people were in Ghana. In Ghana, all of the shops and kiosks had religious names (like "In His Name Fruits & Veges" or "Praise God Electronics"), whereas here, none of them seem to have religious names. We did see one, once, called Mustard Seed Grocery, which only subtly alludes to a story of faith in the Bible.]

After that we had a few speeches from each of the houses, and then one from one of the mums, myself--on behalf of the rest of us volunteers who weren't leaving, and Gladys (who, I may or may not have mentioned, is serving as the executive director while Mum Kate is in the US). Then Gladys gave each of the girls a Kenyan name from a Kenyan tribe. (Lindsey and I will get one, too, when we have our farewell party!) Then each of the five girls leaving made a little speech...I admit, I cried during two of the girls' speeches. It was so sad thinking about the fact that I'm going to have to leave soon and I just got plain emotional from them talking about how remarkable these girls are--because it's so true--and how much the girls here have touched their lives--because they've touched mine so much, too.

After that we went to Baraka to watch a movie. I was allowed to choose the movie since it was my birthday this week, but I decided to let Mum Jane pick the movie since I guessed (correctly) that she probably never gets to choose the movie. She picked Mona Lisa Smile. : ) I think she was really excited, too, to get to pick it. : ) The movie was PG-13, but it strikes me how much more we expose kids that age in America to than they expose kids here to. There were some parts--content and language-wise--that just were not appropriate for these girls, who range in age from 11 or 12 to 14 or 15. This movie would be commonplace for kids in the US--most kids by those ages have seen far worse in movies...but scenes talking about birth control just seemed wildly inappropriate here. Maybe it would be inappropriate in the US too and I just don't spend that much time with young teenagers in the US...but it seems like American teenagers are exposed to a lot more than these teens. (That might be a totally different story, though, if these girls weren't here. And I can't even begin to tell you the horrific things these girls have experienced and seen in person in their few years of life so far...I guess maybe kids are seeing and hearing and doing things they shouldn't at such a young age everywhere...)

Well, that's all for now. That was a pretty long post...

Kwaheri. (Goodbye....Oh yeah, Gladys has been helping Lindsey and I with our Swahili, too!)